18.12.11
28.11.11
“The time will come when, with elation you will greet yourself arriving at your own door, in your own mirror and each will smile at the other’s welcome, and say, sit here. Eat. You will love again the stranger who was your self. Give wine. Give bread. Give back your heart to itself, to the stranger who has loved you all your life, whom you ignored for another, who knows you by heart. Take down the love letters from the bookshelf, the photographs, the desperate notes, peel your own image from the mirror. Sit. Feast on your life.”
| — | Derek Walcott |
17.11.11
12.11.11
I wonder.
How can I miss one being this much
As if the world cannot contain such a love
For I weep to be within the arms of his words
The voice and the eyes of the moon I seek
I feel you in between the valleys of my fingers
My mind longs to fit under yours
You make me feel like I fit
As though you have created a home for me
A roof and a fire to keep me reserved
You are the beautiful house
My Love, you are
27.10.11
"Poetry doesn’t pay anything, but it was a form I needed. It was a kind of a passionate, pleasurable, selfish, nice form where you could scream a little bit." --Charles Bukowski
"The free soul is rare, but you know it when you see it—basically because you feel good, very good, when you are near or with them." --Charles Bukowski
"The free soul is rare, but you know it when you see it—basically because you feel good, very good, when you are near or with them." --Charles Bukowski
24.10.11
15.10.11
“I think we’re always responsible for our actions. We’re free. I raise my hand – I’m responsible. I turn my head to the right – I’m responsible. I’m unhappy – I’m responsible. I smoke a cigarette – I’m responsible. I shut my eyes – I’m responsible. I forget that I’m responsible, but I am. I told you escape is a pipe dream. After all, everything is beautiful. You only have to take an interest in things, see their beauty. It’s true. After all, things are just what they are. A face is a face. Plates are plates. Men are men. And life…is life.” - Nana Kleinfrankenheim
"Happiness is the consequence of personal effort. You fight for it, strive for it, insist upon it, and sometimes even travel around the world looking for it. You have to participate relentlessly in the manifestations of your own blessings. And once you have achieved a state of happiness, you must never become lax about maintaining it. You must make a mighty effort to keep swimming upward into that happiness forever, to stay afloat on top of it."
http://her0inchic.wordpress.com/2011/10/08/2156/
http://her0inchic.wordpress.com/2011/10/08/2156/
12.10.11
10 Things Every Creative Person (That’s YOU) Must Learn
Here is a list of 10 things I’ve learned the hard way that every photographer, designer, creative–hell, every creative person–should know.
1. Experts aren’t the answer.
The blogs, the teachers, the mentors, the seminars aren’t the answer. They’re not there to tell you exactly what you need to know. If they’re good, then they are there to give you some ideas, some guidelines, or some rules to learn and subsequently break. This isn’t about the expert, it’s about you. In creative pursuits especially…what’s going on inside you is where the answers can be found. Hear what experts say, but don’t always listen to them.
The blogs, the teachers, the mentors, the seminars aren’t the answer. They’re not there to tell you exactly what you need to know. If they’re good, then they are there to give you some ideas, some guidelines, or some rules to learn and subsequently break. This isn’t about the expert, it’s about you. In creative pursuits especially…what’s going on inside you is where the answers can be found. Hear what experts say, but don’t always listen to them.
2. Clients cannot tell you what they need.
Clients hire you because they have a problem. They need a great visual representation of something, a solution. They think they know the best way to photograph something, but they don’t really. That’s why they hire you. Take their suggestions to heart, because they definitely know their brand, product, their vision–perhaps even shoot a few versions of the images they THINK they want to see first–but then go nuts with own vision. Add value. Show them something they didn’t expect. Don’t be a monkey with a finger. Remember why you got hired…that YOU are the badass image maker. If you are good enough to get selected for the job, you should be good enough to drive the photographic vision.
Clients hire you because they have a problem. They need a great visual representation of something, a solution. They think they know the best way to photograph something, but they don’t really. That’s why they hire you. Take their suggestions to heart, because they definitely know their brand, product, their vision–perhaps even shoot a few versions of the images they THINK they want to see first–but then go nuts with own vision. Add value. Show them something they didn’t expect. Don’t be a monkey with a finger. Remember why you got hired…that YOU are the badass image maker. If you are good enough to get selected for the job, you should be good enough to drive the photographic vision.
3. Don’t aim for ‘better’, aim for ‘different’.
It’s funny how related “better” and “different” are. If you aim for ‘better’ that usually means you’re walking in the footsteps of someone else. There will often be someone better than you, someone making those footsteps you’re following… But if you target being different–thinking in new ways, creating new things–then you are blazing your own trail. And in blazing your own trail, making your own footprints, you are far more likely to find yourself being ‘better’ without even trying. Better becomes easy because it’s really just different. You can’t stand out from the crowd by just being better. You have to be different.
It’s funny how related “better” and “different” are. If you aim for ‘better’ that usually means you’re walking in the footsteps of someone else. There will often be someone better than you, someone making those footsteps you’re following… But if you target being different–thinking in new ways, creating new things–then you are blazing your own trail. And in blazing your own trail, making your own footprints, you are far more likely to find yourself being ‘better’ without even trying. Better becomes easy because it’s really just different. You can’t stand out from the crowd by just being better. You have to be different.
4. Big challenges create the best work.
If you get assignments that are pushing your vision, your skills, then awesome. Kudos to you, keep getting those assignments. If you’re not getting those assignments, then you need to be self-assigning that challenging work. Give yourself tough deadlines and tougher creative challenges. You do your best work where there is a challenge that is clearly present and 10 feet taller than you think you can handle.
If you get assignments that are pushing your vision, your skills, then awesome. Kudos to you, keep getting those assignments. If you’re not getting those assignments, then you need to be self-assigning that challenging work. Give yourself tough deadlines and tougher creative challenges. You do your best work where there is a challenge that is clearly present and 10 feet taller than you think you can handle.
5. Aesthetic sensibilities actually matter.
Go figure on this one… I’m constantly surprised as how much this is overlooked. Read this and believe it: You must develop a keen understanding of design, color, light, and composition. To just say “I know a picture when I like it” isn’t going to get you anywhere. You need to know –for your own sake as well as the sake of your clients who will ask you– WHY a photo is a great photo. WHY is this one better than that one. If you don’t have any visual vocabulary, opinion, or aesthetic sensibility you won’t be able to explain these things. You won’t get the job. Or if you do get the job, you won’t be able to explain why your photos are worth getting hired again by the same client for the next campaign, story, or video. Trust me on this. Develop a sense of visual taste.
Go figure on this one… I’m constantly surprised as how much this is overlooked. Read this and believe it: You must develop a keen understanding of design, color, light, and composition. To just say “I know a picture when I like it” isn’t going to get you anywhere. You need to know –for your own sake as well as the sake of your clients who will ask you– WHY a photo is a great photo. WHY is this one better than that one. If you don’t have any visual vocabulary, opinion, or aesthetic sensibility you won’t be able to explain these things. You won’t get the job. Or if you do get the job, you won’t be able to explain why your photos are worth getting hired again by the same client for the next campaign, story, or video. Trust me on this. Develop a sense of visual taste.
6. Simple is good.
Almost every photo that is bad has too much information. Outside of technical basics, the number one reason that most photos fail is because there is no clear subject. Often this is the case with design, film, fashion, you name it. Remove clutter, remove distraction. Tell one story, and tell it well.
Almost every photo that is bad has too much information. Outside of technical basics, the number one reason that most photos fail is because there is no clear subject. Often this is the case with design, film, fashion, you name it. Remove clutter, remove distraction. Tell one story, and tell it well.
7. Make mistakes, learn quickly.
Simply put, you need to be able to learn from your mistakes. Avoiding failure is not the goal. The goal is recovering from mistakes quickly. That goes for ever element of your photography–creative, business, vision…you name it. If you’re not willing to make mistakes, you’ll be paralyzed with inaction. That is the devil. Get out there and do stuff. If it works, do more of it. If it doesn’t work, change it. Quickly.
Simply put, you need to be able to learn from your mistakes. Avoiding failure is not the goal. The goal is recovering from mistakes quickly. That goes for ever element of your photography–creative, business, vision…you name it. If you’re not willing to make mistakes, you’ll be paralyzed with inaction. That is the devil. Get out there and do stuff. If it works, do more of it. If it doesn’t work, change it. Quickly.
8. “Value” is different from “price.”
Don’t compete on price alone. That is certain death in any creative field. Focus on delivering value and price yourself accordingly. If you deliver great value with your images — better than expected, and better than your competition– and you can illustrate that through any means, then you should be more expensive. And remember that value comes in many forms.
Don’t compete on price alone. That is certain death in any creative field. Focus on delivering value and price yourself accordingly. If you deliver great value with your images — better than expected, and better than your competition– and you can illustrate that through any means, then you should be more expensive. And remember that value comes in many forms.
9. A-Gamers work with A-Gamers.
If you are good at what you do, then you work–or seek to work–with other people who kick ass too. If you suck, then you put yourself around sucky people to feel better about yourself. If you want to be the best, seek to be around awesome people–be it other artists, assistants, producers, clients, partners, whatever. Shoot high. Shoot for better than yourself.
If you are good at what you do, then you work–or seek to work–with other people who kick ass too. If you suck, then you put yourself around sucky people to feel better about yourself. If you want to be the best, seek to be around awesome people–be it other artists, assistants, producers, clients, partners, whatever. Shoot high. Shoot for better than yourself.
10. Real artists create.
Do you just sit around and think of stuff you could create, photograph, build, ship, or design, but never output anything? Then you’re a poser. Take a new approach and make stuff. Maybe what comes out of your studio isn’t perfect, but there should always stuff leaving the door and hitting the web, the page, the billboard, the gallery, or the street. If you are for real, you’ll be pumping out work on the regular.
Do you just sit around and think of stuff you could create, photograph, build, ship, or design, but never output anything? Then you’re a poser. Take a new approach and make stuff. Maybe what comes out of your studio isn’t perfect, but there should always stuff leaving the door and hitting the web, the page, the billboard, the gallery, or the street. If you are for real, you’ll be pumping out work on the regular.
There you go. Now don’t just read this list, KNOW this li
8.10.11
6.10.11
5.10.11
“ 1: Be authentic. The most powerful asset you have is your individuality, what makes you unique. It’s time to stop listening to others on what you should do.
2: Work harder than anyone else and you will always benefit from the effort.
3: Get off the computer and connect with real people and culture. Life is visceral.
4: Constantly improve your craft. Make things with your hands. Innovation in thinking is not enough.
5: Travel as much as you can. It is a humbling and inspiring experience to learn just how much you don’t know.
6: Being original is still king, especially in this tech-driven, group-grope world.
7: Try not to work for stupid people or you’ll soon become one of them.
8: Instinct and intuition are all-powerful. Learn to trust them.
9: The Golden Rule actually works. Do good.
10: If all else fails, No. 2 is the greatest competitive advantage of any career.
http://www.aiga.org/design-journeys-john-jay/
2: Work harder than anyone else and you will always benefit from the effort.
3: Get off the computer and connect with real people and culture. Life is visceral.
4: Constantly improve your craft. Make things with your hands. Innovation in thinking is not enough.
5: Travel as much as you can. It is a humbling and inspiring experience to learn just how much you don’t know.
6: Being original is still king, especially in this tech-driven, group-grope world.
7: Try not to work for stupid people or you’ll soon become one of them.
8: Instinct and intuition are all-powerful. Learn to trust them.
9: The Golden Rule actually works. Do good.
10: If all else fails, No. 2 is the greatest competitive advantage of any career.
http://www.aiga.org/design-journeys-john-jay/
25.9.11
The Flowering
Just in time for the 6th day (the flowering phase of The Tree of Life), in the 11th heaven of the 9th (& final) wave of the Mayan Calendar… which ends on 10/28/11, according to Carl Calleman… and as a result of the rising discontent in those around us, the time has come for the way-showers to honor and share our deeply held & hard-earned wisdoms with more of humanity. For those leaders of the new world who have been held back, unheard, thwarted from complete self-expression or deterred from sharing full-truth with others, your time has come. The unseens say that this group of souls has received the clarion call to come out of hiding, to stand up in personal truth with honor & integrity, to bear witness to the changes that are taking place all around us, and while holding the vastness of our wisdom and knowledge with authority, with sovereignty, but most importantly…without fail. This will mean different things to different people, but I am hearing that each of us will be tested in some way to apply the full strength of our light.
“Now, we realize that this may be a bit of a struggle for those around you…in the sense that the changes in you will require changes in all those close to you, and to that we say…be not afraid. Be all you came here to be lest you risk losing an opportunity at magnificence. The time for shining your full light is now and you will be presented with many situations in the coming days which will require this of you. We are not saying that this will present challenges by way of discordance, but by way of displaying your inner-strength in a manner that can be definitively seen, felt and heard by others. Many of the new leaders have been hiding behind the cloak of unworthiness for far too long, waiting for the final reconnection to your genetic excellence…for these souls, a great opening is upon you, a shift in the way you participate with your truth and display it to others.” -Seven Sisters
For those who have begun this transition into full-truth, into authentic being-ness, and are arriving on the “other-side”…a congratulations is in order! Your world is already beginning to shift in magnificent, supportive & awe-inspiring ways. And this is just the very beginning.
The true measure of our authentic self-expression is realized by the level and amount of reciprocation from the world around us now. Our external world is always an accurate depiction of our inner-dwelling, so as we participate with the physical world from our singular point of truth, the reflections of our light now shining back at us can be eye-opening and heart-expanding…revealing/reflecting not only the accuracy and alignment with our authentic core-selves, but the physical evidence of our unmistakable inner-beauty that has been…for so long…quashed under the weight of our self-percevied limitations.
In other words, we are being de-cloaked and as a result the outside world is beginning to see our divinity…our pure-heart radiance… because, ultimately, we are now more aligned with and operating from divine LOVE. These experiences of being “seen”, for who we really are…and as if for the first time…can be jolting after so many years of hiding our true selves and being discounted or judged by conventional thinkers steeped in doctrine.
Coming out can be off-putting because, lets face it, we’re gun-shy…and even when we do need to use our guns, they are always cocked with a string of defenses…some from rote memory, some completely made up: like when you run into an old friend from yoga whom you haven’t seen in 5 years and after a very thorough once over, you get asked the fateful & dreaded question….“so what have YOU been up to?” And in that very moment…you’re presented with the sobering reality that it a b s o l u t e l y looks like you’ve done nothing…except age…and your faced with the depressing double bind decision of…Do I lie to her, or to myself?
This is that moment when all the blood from your limbs pools in your ears, noise fades, and someone from deep within you emerges with an interesting and “creative” story about just.what.you’ve.been.up.to.
We’ve all been there and wondered who we can & can’t tell that we’ve actually spent the bulk of the last 5-7 years in fetal position waiting to be (re)born.
But that’s over now. According to the unseens…no more hiding. We are being called forth by those who need us and we will be received with love. Not only that, but once we move past the insecurity of being judged or laughed at, the unexpected warm reception by others can spur a knee-buckling level of gratitude.
You may be noticing these true heart-based connections emerging all around you…even with strangers…a feeling that suddenly everyone’s light has been turned on. But the truth is that these are just the reflections of our own internal light shining so brightly now that the world can finally see it.
This is how you really know when its your time to shine. Not only because you have something to share, but because you are being beckoned to share it.
Just in time for the 6th day (the flowering phase of The Tree of Life), in the 11th heaven of the 9th (& final) wave of the Mayan Calendar… which ends on 10/28/11, according to Carl Calleman… and as a result of the rising discontent in those around us, the time has come for the way-showers to honor and share our deeply held & hard-earned wisdoms with more of humanity. For those leaders of the new world who have been held back, unheard, thwarted from complete self-expression or deterred from sharing full-truth with others, your time has come. The unseens say that this group of souls has received the clarion call to come out of hiding, to stand up in personal truth with honor & integrity, to bear witness to the changes that are taking place all around us, and while holding the vastness of our wisdom and knowledge with authority, with sovereignty, but most importantly…without fail. This will mean different things to different people, but I am hearing that each of us will be tested in some way to apply the full strength of our light.
“Now, we realize that this may be a bit of a struggle for those around you…in the sense that the changes in you will require changes in all those close to you, and to that we say…be not afraid. Be all you came here to be lest you risk losing an opportunity at magnificence. The time for shining your full light is now and you will be presented with many situations in the coming days which will require this of you. We are not saying that this will present challenges by way of discordance, but by way of displaying your inner-strength in a manner that can be definitively seen, felt and heard by others. Many of the new leaders have been hiding behind the cloak of unworthiness for far too long, waiting for the final reconnection to your genetic excellence…for these souls, a great opening is upon you, a shift in the way you participate with your truth and display it to others.” -Seven Sisters
For those who have begun this transition into full-truth, into authentic being-ness, and are arriving on the “other-side”…a congratulations is in order! Your world is already beginning to shift in magnificent, supportive & awe-inspiring ways. And this is just the very beginning.
The true measure of our authentic self-expression is realized by the level and amount of reciprocation from the world around us now. Our external world is always an accurate depiction of our inner-dwelling, so as we participate with the physical world from our singular point of truth, the reflections of our light now shining back at us can be eye-opening and heart-expanding…revealing/reflecting not only the accuracy and alignment with our authentic core-selves, but the physical evidence of our unmistakable inner-beauty that has been…for so long…quashed under the weight of our self-percevied limitations.
In other words, we are being de-cloaked and as a result the outside world is beginning to see our divinity…our pure-heart radiance… because, ultimately, we are now more aligned with and operating from divine LOVE. These experiences of being “seen”, for who we really are…and as if for the first time…can be jolting after so many years of hiding our true selves and being discounted or judged by conventional thinkers steeped in doctrine.
Coming out can be off-putting because, lets face it, we’re gun-shy…and even when we do need to use our guns, they are always cocked with a string of defenses…some from rote memory, some completely made up: like when you run into an old friend from yoga whom you haven’t seen in 5 years and after a very thorough once over, you get asked the fateful & dreaded question….“so what have YOU been up to?” And in that very moment…you’re presented with the sobering reality that it a b s o l u t e l y looks like you’ve done nothing…except age…and your faced with the depressing double bind decision of…Do I lie to her, or to myself?
This is that moment when all the blood from your limbs pools in your ears, noise fades, and someone from deep within you emerges with an interesting and “creative” story about just.what.you’ve.been.up.to.
We’ve all been there and wondered who we can & can’t tell that we’ve actually spent the bulk of the last 5-7 years in fetal position waiting to be (re)born.
But that’s over now. According to the unseens…no more hiding. We are being called forth by those who need us and we will be received with love. Not only that, but once we move past the insecurity of being judged or laughed at, the unexpected warm reception by others can spur a knee-buckling level of gratitude.
You may be noticing these true heart-based connections emerging all around you…even with strangers…a feeling that suddenly everyone’s light has been turned on. But the truth is that these are just the reflections of our own internal light shining so brightly now that the world can finally see it.
This is how you really know when its your time to shine. Not only because you have something to share, but because you are being beckoned to share it.
9.9.11
I've been sleeping well
I've also been raining well
Last night I barely slept
Because I was too shaken up for today
The past two Suns barely saw you
Were you there, were you out there?
I can't be certain
And today I thought there was a sureness
A wide field to make sure I would see you
I kept my eyes peeled for the sight of you
So I wouldn't miss you
I wanted to close my eyes and sleep
Though there was a fear if I doze you would miss me
I don't want to be kept here waiting for you
But I can't not
I can't just sort of kind of love you
It's not fair for you or me
I'm here hanging by a line
Just waiting
Kept here waiting for you
I've also been raining well
Last night I barely slept
Because I was too shaken up for today
The past two Suns barely saw you
Were you there, were you out there?
I can't be certain
And today I thought there was a sureness
A wide field to make sure I would see you
I kept my eyes peeled for the sight of you
So I wouldn't miss you
I wanted to close my eyes and sleep
Though there was a fear if I doze you would miss me
I don't want to be kept here waiting for you
But I can't not
I can't just sort of kind of love you
It's not fair for you or me
I'm here hanging by a line
Just waiting
Kept here waiting for you
6.9.11
5.9.11
Love Said to Me
I worship the moon.
Tell me of the soft glow of a
candle light
and the sweetness of my moon.
Tell me of the soft glow of a
candle light
and the sweetness of my moon.
Don't talk about sorrow,
tell me of that treasure,
hidden if it is to you,
then just remain silent.
tell me of that treasure,
hidden if it is to you,
then just remain silent.
Last night
I lost my grip on reality
and welcomed insanity.
Love
saw me and said,
I showed up.
Wipe you tears
and be silent.
I lost my grip on reality
and welcomed insanity.
Love
saw me and said,
I showed up.
Wipe you tears
and be silent.
I said, O Love
I am frightened,
but it's not you.
Love said to me,
there is nothing that is not me.
be silent.
I am frightened,
but it's not you.
Love said to me,
there is nothing that is not me.
be silent.
I will whisper secrets in your ear
just nod yes
and be silent.
just nod yes
and be silent.
A soul moon
appeared in the path of my heart.
How precious is this journey.
appeared in the path of my heart.
How precious is this journey.
I said, O Love
what kind of moon is this?
Love said to me,
this is not for you to question.
be silent.
what kind of moon is this?
Love said to me,
this is not for you to question.
be silent.
I said, O Love
what kind of face is this,
angelic, or human?
Love said to me,
this is beyond anything that you know.
Be silent.
what kind of face is this,
angelic, or human?
Love said to me,
this is beyond anything that you know.
Be silent.
I said, please reveal this to me
I am dying in anticipation.
Love said to me,
that is where I want you:
Always on the edge,
be silent.
You dwell in this hall of
images and illusions,
leave this house now
and be silent.
I am dying in anticipation.
Love said to me,
that is where I want you:
Always on the edge,
be silent.
You dwell in this hall of
images and illusions,
leave this house now
and be silent.
I said, O Love,
tell me this:
Does the Lord know you are
treating me this way?
Love said to me,
yes He does,
just be totally…
totally… silent
tell me this:
Does the Lord know you are
treating me this way?
Love said to me,
yes He does,
just be totally…
totally… silent
--Rumi
20.8.11
Our worst fear is not that we are inadequate, our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be? Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are born to manifest the glory within us. It is not just in some of us, it is in everyone and as we let our own light shine we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear our presence automatically liberates others.
--Nelson Mandela
--Nelson Mandela
1.8.11
I wonder where the rest of me resides
Are you nonexistent?
Are you in things I have not met yet?
In people, in places, in experiences
I wonder if this idea of feeling more whole is out there somewhere
It must, if I am wondering about it
But what is this peculiar language I speak?
And this I wonder if anyone else knows my soul's dialect
It's tragic to wonder if there's someone for me, like me
If that someone is me, my ideal me
I don't feel whole, World, I don't feel whole
Please send me the other parts of me
My Being, my Soul
But higher than that, send me patience
Calm my chaos
Understand my tension
Tell me the ways of water
Because I don't like a secluded reality
So send me people, send me places
Send me my entirety of my Soul.
Are you nonexistent?
Are you in things I have not met yet?
In people, in places, in experiences
I wonder if this idea of feeling more whole is out there somewhere
It must, if I am wondering about it
But what is this peculiar language I speak?
And this I wonder if anyone else knows my soul's dialect
It's tragic to wonder if there's someone for me, like me
If that someone is me, my ideal me
I don't feel whole, World, I don't feel whole
Please send me the other parts of me
My Being, my Soul
But higher than that, send me patience
Calm my chaos
Understand my tension
Tell me the ways of water
Because I don't like a secluded reality
So send me people, send me places
Send me my entirety of my Soul.
21.7.11
Dear Tucson,
My heart is heavy from you, my heart is lifted by you.
Tucson, you have found so much of me. I’m embarrassed that you had to see me
sit in a box for such a long time in the beginning, but only with your corners
and your petals could I have elevated. Because you slowly and patiently lured
me out of a cave to feel the rays of the living. You gradually gave sight to a
fool; a maturing fool. You have handled my sensitive soul during unfitting
times, but you’ve also given me feelings that flew me to the tips of the peaks.
And I love that those are the ones highlighted in my memory. You’ve shown me
what love is my dear Tucson and you’ve given me loves to have. You have been in
front of me, opening doors and it was only my doing that closed them or walked
by because I was too wrapped inside my own mind. So thank you Home for being
open for me, and thank you Self for watching the Sun rise rather than set. I
love you for all the little places you carry on your back and I love you for
all the water you’ve poured on my dry soul. Forever Tucson you are embedded in
the shape of my heart for you were the one who built the delicate frames that
the rest of my life’s veins grow upon.
Sincerely,
A trying spirit
07212011
20.7.11
The Invitation
It doesn't interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing.
It doesn't interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dream, for the adventure of being alive.
It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon. I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow, if you have been opened by life's betrayals or have become shriveled and closed from fear of further pain. I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it or fade it or fix it.
I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own, if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, to be realistic, to remember the limitations of being human.
It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want you to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself; if you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul; if you can be faithless and therefore trustworthy.
I want to know if you can see beauty, even when it's not pretty, every day, and if you can source your own life from its presence.
I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine, and still stand on the edge of the lake and shout to the silver of the full moon, "Yes!"
It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up, after the night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone, and do what needs to be done to feed the children.
It doesn't interest me who you know or how you came to be here. I want to know if you will stand in the center of the fire with me and not shrink back.
I doesn't interest me where or what or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you, from the inside, when all else falls away.
I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.
It doesn't interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing.
It doesn't interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dream, for the adventure of being alive.
It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon. I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow, if you have been opened by life's betrayals or have become shriveled and closed from fear of further pain. I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it or fade it or fix it.
I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own, if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, to be realistic, to remember the limitations of being human.
It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want you to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself; if you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul; if you can be faithless and therefore trustworthy.
I want to know if you can see beauty, even when it's not pretty, every day, and if you can source your own life from its presence.
I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine, and still stand on the edge of the lake and shout to the silver of the full moon, "Yes!"
It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up, after the night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone, and do what needs to be done to feed the children.
It doesn't interest me who you know or how you came to be here. I want to know if you will stand in the center of the fire with me and not shrink back.
I doesn't interest me where or what or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you, from the inside, when all else falls away.
I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.
18.7.11
The Creative Process
By Paulo Coelho
Every creative process, be it literature, in engineering, in information technology - and even in love - always respects a same pattern: the cycle of nature.
a] field plowing: at the moment the soil is plowed up, oxygen penetrates where it was not able to reach up to then. The field gets a new face, the soil that was on top is now underneath and what was beneath turned into surface. This inner revolution process is very important, for just as the new face of that field will be seeing the sun for the first time, and be dazzled by it; a reassessment of our values will enable us to see life with innocence and no naivete.
b] seeding: every creation is the result of a contact with life. The creating Man can not lock himself up inside an ivory tower; he needs to share his human condition. He will never know what will turn out to be important in the future, so that, the more intense his life, the more possibilities he will have in order to find an original language. Le Corbusier used to say that "while Man wanted to fly imitating the birds, he was never able." The same happens with the artist: although artists are translators of emotions, the language they translate are not entirely known by them, and if they try to imitate or control their inspiration, they will never reach the goal they wish to achieve.
c] maturing: there is a time in which a work of art writes itself into the author's soul - before the artist ventures to manifest it. In the case of literature, for example, the book is influencing the writer and vice-versa. It is to that moment that the Brazilian poet Carlos Drummond de Andrade refers to when he says that we should never collect the verses that go lost, as they do not deserve to see the light of day. I know people who take notes compulsively of everything crossing their mind during the maturing stage, not respecting what is being written in the unconscious. The result is that those notes, outcomes of the mind, end up disturbing the results of inspiration. The creator needs to respect the development, even though they know - just as farmers do - that they just have a partial control over their field. They are exposed to droughts or inundations. But if they know to wait, the stronger plant, which resisted to the entire inclemency, will come to light with all its strength.
d] harvesting: this is a moment in which Man will manifest what he planted and left to mature, on a conscious level. If he harvests too soon the fruit will be green, if he harvest too late, it will be rotten. Every artist knows to recognize the arrival of this moment. Although certain questions have not matured enough yet and some ideas might not be clear and crystalline, they organize themselves as the work of art is being created. With discipline and no fear, artists understand that it is necessary to work every day until their works are complete.
And what should we do with the results of harvesting? Again, we look at Mother Nature: it shares everything with us. Artists who want to keep their works to themselves are neither being fair to what they were given in the present moment, nor to the inheritance and the teachings of their forefathers. If we leave our seeds stocked in the barn, they will end up decaying, even if they have been harvested in the right moment. When harvesting is done, the moment in which it is necessary to share one's own soul, with no fear or shame, has arrived. That is the artist's mission.
By Paulo Coelho
Every creative process, be it literature, in engineering, in information technology - and even in love - always respects a same pattern: the cycle of nature.
a] field plowing: at the moment the soil is plowed up, oxygen penetrates where it was not able to reach up to then. The field gets a new face, the soil that was on top is now underneath and what was beneath turned into surface. This inner revolution process is very important, for just as the new face of that field will be seeing the sun for the first time, and be dazzled by it; a reassessment of our values will enable us to see life with innocence and no naivete.
b] seeding: every creation is the result of a contact with life. The creating Man can not lock himself up inside an ivory tower; he needs to share his human condition. He will never know what will turn out to be important in the future, so that, the more intense his life, the more possibilities he will have in order to find an original language. Le Corbusier used to say that "while Man wanted to fly imitating the birds, he was never able." The same happens with the artist: although artists are translators of emotions, the language they translate are not entirely known by them, and if they try to imitate or control their inspiration, they will never reach the goal they wish to achieve.
c] maturing: there is a time in which a work of art writes itself into the author's soul - before the artist ventures to manifest it. In the case of literature, for example, the book is influencing the writer and vice-versa. It is to that moment that the Brazilian poet Carlos Drummond de Andrade refers to when he says that we should never collect the verses that go lost, as they do not deserve to see the light of day. I know people who take notes compulsively of everything crossing their mind during the maturing stage, not respecting what is being written in the unconscious. The result is that those notes, outcomes of the mind, end up disturbing the results of inspiration. The creator needs to respect the development, even though they know - just as farmers do - that they just have a partial control over their field. They are exposed to droughts or inundations. But if they know to wait, the stronger plant, which resisted to the entire inclemency, will come to light with all its strength.
d] harvesting: this is a moment in which Man will manifest what he planted and left to mature, on a conscious level. If he harvests too soon the fruit will be green, if he harvest too late, it will be rotten. Every artist knows to recognize the arrival of this moment. Although certain questions have not matured enough yet and some ideas might not be clear and crystalline, they organize themselves as the work of art is being created. With discipline and no fear, artists understand that it is necessary to work every day until their works are complete.
And what should we do with the results of harvesting? Again, we look at Mother Nature: it shares everything with us. Artists who want to keep their works to themselves are neither being fair to what they were given in the present moment, nor to the inheritance and the teachings of their forefathers. If we leave our seeds stocked in the barn, they will end up decaying, even if they have been harvested in the right moment. When harvesting is done, the moment in which it is necessary to share one's own soul, with no fear or shame, has arrived. That is the artist's mission.
I had a dream last night.
I was strong. I allowed others to go in front and ahead of me. Because it didn't matter to take the most efficient way, I wanted to trail off on my own. To feel my own strength to take me to my destination. To make good quality time with the breeze against me. I carried a heavy load on my back but all of it was bare necessities. I was holding onto veins and making my way through the darkened roots. I fully trusted myself and forgot the existence of. . . .doubt, is it called? Yes that, it didn't occur to me what that was. I went because I knew I should, that it was the only way. I dodged teethed demons at every obstacle, they tried, but I succeeded them. Drops of fear in my blood flow only supported that I should push myself even more. It only lived so that it could remind me I was living.
And when I woke I felt accomplished, I felt so utterly good about myself. I felt that I was brave.
I felt my potential.
I was strong. I allowed others to go in front and ahead of me. Because it didn't matter to take the most efficient way, I wanted to trail off on my own. To feel my own strength to take me to my destination. To make good quality time with the breeze against me. I carried a heavy load on my back but all of it was bare necessities. I was holding onto veins and making my way through the darkened roots. I fully trusted myself and forgot the existence of. . . .doubt, is it called? Yes that, it didn't occur to me what that was. I went because I knew I should, that it was the only way. I dodged teethed demons at every obstacle, they tried, but I succeeded them. Drops of fear in my blood flow only supported that I should push myself even more. It only lived so that it could remind me I was living.
And when I woke I felt accomplished, I felt so utterly good about myself. I felt that I was brave.
I felt my potential.
27.6.11
"Nobody tells this to people who are beginners; I wish someone told me. All of us who do creative work, we get into it because we have good taste. But there is this gap. For the first couple of years you make stuff, it’s just not that good. It’s trying to be good, it has potential, but it’s not. But your taste, the thing that got you into the game, is still killer. And your taste is why your work disappoints you. A lot of people never get past this phase, they quit. Most people I know who do interesting, creative work went through years of this. We know our work doesn’t have this special thing that we want it to have. We all go through this. And if you are just starting out or you are still in this phase, you gotta know it's normal and the most important thing you can do is do a lot of work. Put yourself on a deadline so that every week you will finish one story. It is only by going through a volume of work that you will close that gap, and your work will be as good as your ambitions. And I took longer to figure out how to do this than anyone I’ve ever met. It’s gonna take awhile. It’s normal to take awhile. You’ve just gotta fight your way through"
— Ira Glass
10.6.11
And these are the times
The times when your heart is beating next to my own
When your hands touch my skin
As though the contact is able to awaken me
You and I are words that have dissolved away
It is only Us now, love
We are all that are in the world
And these are the times
The times when we swear reality transitioned into Dream
I have accepted those moments
To dismiss the confusion on how righteous I can feel
To accept a Universe that is truly boundless
I don't question why you have come to me
But hold you closer with beauty of an answered prayer
And these are the times
The times when my eyes look deep into yours
When my sight follows the history of your face
The way you blink your eyes causes my heart to engrain deeper into my chest
Though, where are you darling?
Have the waters taken you astray, far away from my sight?
Until You and I come in unison again my dear I will hold onto these sounds of our past dreams
For these were the times
The times when your heart is beating next to my own
When your hands touch my skin
As though the contact is able to awaken me
You and I are words that have dissolved away
It is only Us now, love
We are all that are in the world
And these are the times
The times when we swear reality transitioned into Dream
I have accepted those moments
To dismiss the confusion on how righteous I can feel
To accept a Universe that is truly boundless
I don't question why you have come to me
But hold you closer with beauty of an answered prayer
And these are the times
The times when my eyes look deep into yours
When my sight follows the history of your face
The way you blink your eyes causes my heart to engrain deeper into my chest
Though, where are you darling?
Have the waters taken you astray, far away from my sight?
Until You and I come in unison again my dear I will hold onto these sounds of our past dreams
For these were the times
9.5.11
Where has the clarity gone
Each detail I use to hold precious
Here in the valleys of my hands
Where has the structure broken down
The one I use to hold onto so dearly
With the muscles of my fingers
Where has the magic escaped to
The fluid dancing melodies
As the beat of my heart
Where has the memory strayed
To find a lost home
Back where it belongs
Where has the shine in your eye hidden
I saw your mind wonder
Afar from me
Where has reality transcended
Distant from what I know
Gone into the depths of the forests
Where have I floated
In this river of dream
Blurring me away
Each detail I use to hold precious
Here in the valleys of my hands
Where has the structure broken down
The one I use to hold onto so dearly
With the muscles of my fingers
Where has the magic escaped to
The fluid dancing melodies
As the beat of my heart
Where has the memory strayed
To find a lost home
Back where it belongs
Where has the shine in your eye hidden
I saw your mind wonder
Afar from me
Where has reality transcended
Distant from what I know
Gone into the depths of the forests
Where have I floated
In this river of dream
Blurring me away
1.5.11
We sat side by side together
The most silent moment I had shared that day
My dreams are becoming more true to my senses
And my reality is turning bright and lucid
Effortless without a seam
It's transitioning into "whatever"
Not that I don't care my dear
I do all tremendously
But we let go of what doesn't need to be held onto
And those things that we have of value sit with us here quietly
All along they are there but you never knew
They rest within us waiting to be stirred up
Waiting for us to be awakened to hold hands with them
Waiting to be embraced with the energy of fire in our souls
They are patient while resting in our centers
Let us feed them sparks
More and more until they build enough to break the limit
Let them exert the shockwave to revealing their core
Like the glory of a supernova but we will be reborn
The most silent moment I had shared that day
My dreams are becoming more true to my senses
And my reality is turning bright and lucid
Effortless without a seam
It's transitioning into "whatever"
Not that I don't care my dear
I do all tremendously
But we let go of what doesn't need to be held onto
And those things that we have of value sit with us here quietly
All along they are there but you never knew
They rest within us waiting to be stirred up
Waiting for us to be awakened to hold hands with them
Waiting to be embraced with the energy of fire in our souls
They are patient while resting in our centers
Let us feed them sparks
More and more until they build enough to break the limit
Let them exert the shockwave to revealing their core
Like the glory of a supernova but we will be reborn
Through all of the pressure and heat we find our Selves
Our Selves that are pure and have been touched by nothing else
Our Selves that have more power than before
And let us all love each other in this dreamed reality
Hand on your arm
Support on your back
Kisses on your cheek
For I love you human condition
I love you through every painful beauty you offer
Our Selves that have more power than before
And let us all love each other in this dreamed reality
Hand on your arm
Support on your back
Kisses on your cheek
For I love you human condition
I love you through every painful beauty you offer
20.4.11
I sit here wondering. My mind gazes at future arrangements: the fall. I have a slowly building community here, but it will temporarily not be. I have a flame burning here, but it will temporarily not be. I have a quietness, a comfortability, a knowledge here, but it will temporarily not be.
And I think of all the potential greatness that could happen within 5 months away. The things I will do, the actions I will try, the level of love that is waiting to be discovered. The restraints, the possibilities. I'm anticipating this heaven to form before me, but don't worry dear I don't just live through anticipation--I try to LIVE it. This is the recorded reminder for my Self; a thought that is gaining physical form and soon into action. For I want to take my semester and push it towards the edge again, revive it's already heavy breath. From euphoric tire to euphoric desire. Integrating and interweaving with the fabrics of the souls I have yet to meet. Everything from before will be pleasantly on hold, busy as I am busy and we shall meet again: re-meet again, all of you. I think it would be nice to distant myself yet again and find another piece of me, another dimension that I don't know of. To create some new from some old to grow grow grow. Because I hold you close World and I am here, trying to stretch myself to wrap my arms warmly around you as we inhale then sigh with a comforting relief as one, together.
Stream of consciousness, 04202011 20:53
And I think of all the potential greatness that could happen within 5 months away. The things I will do, the actions I will try, the level of love that is waiting to be discovered. The restraints, the possibilities. I'm anticipating this heaven to form before me, but don't worry dear I don't just live through anticipation--I try to LIVE it. This is the recorded reminder for my Self; a thought that is gaining physical form and soon into action. For I want to take my semester and push it towards the edge again, revive it's already heavy breath. From euphoric tire to euphoric desire. Integrating and interweaving with the fabrics of the souls I have yet to meet. Everything from before will be pleasantly on hold, busy as I am busy and we shall meet again: re-meet again, all of you. I think it would be nice to distant myself yet again and find another piece of me, another dimension that I don't know of. To create some new from some old to grow grow grow. Because I hold you close World and I am here, trying to stretch myself to wrap my arms warmly around you as we inhale then sigh with a comforting relief as one, together.
Stream of consciousness, 04202011 20:53
18.4.11
But can't I rest here, the day subtly alongside of me
I want to stare up into the nothingness of the ceiling
Reach the end of the skies
Because the view is awfully serene
As though it's the edge of the sea
And the words that it has spoken have not been appreciated enough
I have not stayed long to feel the breeze of the melodies
I want it all, I want to live all the kinds of lives
To swim in the motions of the tides to and fro
But I also want you, and you
I wish to keep all of you
The shells that can make a collection
Because I'm in some sort of worldly love
I want to stare up into the nothingness of the ceiling
Reach the end of the skies
Because the view is awfully serene
As though it's the edge of the sea
And the words that it has spoken have not been appreciated enough
I have not stayed long to feel the breeze of the melodies
I want it all, I want to live all the kinds of lives
To swim in the motions of the tides to and fro
But I also want you, and you
I wish to keep all of you
The shells that can make a collection
Because I'm in some sort of worldly love
Gliding on the shining surface
Through the depths of clarity
But I come back to the middle where the sky meets the ocean
The kind reality
And I try to hold onto the molecules of now
Though the silky water won't stay here in my hands
Though the silky water won't stay here in my hands
Falling back into its origin while I watch its particles disperse
I love you dear water but I know you must go
I can't cage water, I can't cage a bird
5.4.11
But WAIT.
Wouldn't it be lovely for everyone on campus to befriend each other?
Then our cheeks can hurt from smiling
Our arms exhaust from heavy hugs
Our voices tire from caring
Our hearts euphoric with love
Because I saw your face today
As you were riding your bike humbly by
I wave and smile
You reflect the notion
I repeat a degree more enthusiastically
And you reflect once more when you realize who it is
Because I saw you walking with a friend across the street
And I shout hello
Because you saw me and thought I didn't remember you
But I did, I did
Because our paths crossed one another in a time unfamiliar
You acknowledged me with a nod
A curtsy of the mind
I smiled
To you, then to the leaves
Because I walk around trying to smile to strangers
Then you smiled as if you were my undiscovered grandpa
Mouthed "hi" and raised a wave
We shared that moment didn't we?
Because being engaged is much more beautiful than the repulsion of the ego
And patience is kinder to the heart
And sharing the Wonderful makes the souls forge together
"Come my friends, 'tis not too late to seek a newer world."
Wouldn't it be lovely for everyone on campus to befriend each other?
Then our cheeks can hurt from smiling
Our arms exhaust from heavy hugs
Our voices tire from caring
Our hearts euphoric with love
Because I saw your face today
As you were riding your bike humbly by
I wave and smile
You reflect the notion
I repeat a degree more enthusiastically
And you reflect once more when you realize who it is
Because I saw you walking with a friend across the street
And I shout hello
Because you saw me and thought I didn't remember you
But I did, I did
Because our paths crossed one another in a time unfamiliar
You acknowledged me with a nod
A curtsy of the mind
I smiled
To you, then to the leaves
Because I walk around trying to smile to strangers
Then you smiled as if you were my undiscovered grandpa
Mouthed "hi" and raised a wave
We shared that moment didn't we?
Because being engaged is much more beautiful than the repulsion of the ego
And patience is kinder to the heart
And sharing the Wonderful makes the souls forge together
"Come my friends, 'tis not too late to seek a newer world."
28.3.11
21.3.11
19.3.11
Let us take it back to the Romantic time
Where poetry were the words that make us swoon
We sit together in the living room
Listen to classical music with our emotions attached
I look at you silently, fulfilled by your presence
Let us go outside in the sweet air
Lay in the grass with me here
My mind can rest in the nook of your neck
Smiles and shining eyes is all I see from you
We are here
We will be
Where poetry were the words that make us swoon
We sit together in the living room
Listen to classical music with our emotions attached
I look at you silently, fulfilled by your presence
Let us go outside in the sweet air
Lay in the grass with me here
My mind can rest in the nook of your neck
Smiles and shining eyes is all I see from you
We are here
We will be
14.3.11
I think I like finding myself in love.
From one person
Or all persons
It just happens, just shows up
Sneakily and happily
Staying for awhile
We hold soulful hands as if its forever
The future seems a silly thing to worry about
Because all I can FEEL is right now
Touch smell see only for a microsecond until the next
And I try to wonder about dark times behind
To feel some pain that needs to be revisited
From one person
Or all persons
It just happens, just shows up
Sneakily and happily
Staying for awhile
We hold soulful hands as if its forever
The future seems a silly thing to worry about
Because all I can FEEL is right now
Touch smell see only for a microsecond until the next
For your face is in front of mine
The past and future are misplaced itemsAnd I try to wonder about dark times behind
To feel some pain that needs to be revisited
My altered soul feels like it doesn't deserve this much good
Though it's hard to find the shadow with your light
It is difficult to question whether things can come from a purely good feeling
But it does and it is okay that it does
And it should feel okay to be so utterly happy
Though it's hard to find the shadow with your light
It is difficult to question whether things can come from a purely good feeling
But it does and it is okay that it does
And it should feel okay to be so utterly happy
3.3.11
Having a foot here, having one over there
My arm up through the clouds
And the other is lost on the opposite sound
Another foundation engraining underneath
While the pair of eyes seek among the reefs
My ears listen to your footsteps
A hand is held under the sea
Hips join around the art
Our arms linked in the dark
The spirals of our brains come undone
Trying to understand this and everyone
The vessels of the heart let loose from their form
And reach out to all of you to feel beyond the norm
We put our arms up towards the constellation
Wave them in the sky and breathe in the sensation
My arm up through the clouds
And the other is lost on the opposite sound
Another foundation engraining underneath
While the pair of eyes seek among the reefs
My ears listen to your footsteps
A hand is held under the sea
Hips join around the art
Our arms linked in the dark
The spirals of our brains come undone
Trying to understand this and everyone
The vessels of the heart let loose from their form
And reach out to all of you to feel beyond the norm
We put our arms up towards the constellation
Wave them in the sky and breathe in the sensation
1.3.11
Loud Love is all I hear
My neurons are stimulated
No that's not right, they are electrified
Because today was living and breathing closely before me
It was shaking me out of my heavy set eyes
New people kept telling me ideas and I was falling over from euphoria
My heart was overwhelmed by the world
The only act I could handle was sitting and looking up
Up to the ceiling
Up to the clouds
Up to the swaying palm trees
I couldn't handle looking at reality it was too beautiful to conceive
For the sky could bring comfort to tell me it is all a dream
But it is real
I feel it in my hands
That there is an exponential amount of great people in the world
In your immediate environment
I want to meet everyone
Tell me your ideas, let me tell you mine
Let's play together forever
My imaginary mental vows:
You're awesome. I want to hang out with you every single day.
I want to get to know you purely and passionately
My neurons are stimulated
No that's not right, they are electrified
Because today was living and breathing closely before me
It was shaking me out of my heavy set eyes
New people kept telling me ideas and I was falling over from euphoria
My heart was overwhelmed by the world
The only act I could handle was sitting and looking up
Up to the ceiling
Up to the clouds
Up to the swaying palm trees
I couldn't handle looking at reality it was too beautiful to conceive
For the sky could bring comfort to tell me it is all a dream
But it is real
I feel it in my hands
That there is an exponential amount of great people in the world
In your immediate environment
I want to meet everyone
Tell me your ideas, let me tell you mine
Let's play together forever
My imaginary mental vows:
You're awesome. I want to hang out with you every single day.
I want to get to know you purely and passionately
7.2.11
Mom, I know what it means now
To be in love
Psst, she says
No I think I do Mom, at some minute level at least
I kind of understand this cliche
But naturally I think I know it better than that
Because this fallen feeling is securely fragile
It's like being under a house of cards
Come, come with me I'll show you
It is worth the edged unknown
The air is weightless here
It is thin and you don't need to breath hard
I seem to be staring at my hands
Moving them within curiosity
As though I just discovered them
As though I realized how alive I truly am
Bone flesh and blood
Is it all in me? Generating itself?
For it's not wondering why it is doing so, but just does
And perhaps I shouldn't wonder why I am here
But just do
Exist with a dance of the soul and be useful
And love, LOVE
Is the highest I can offer
So Mom, I'm practicing the art
In practicing, I think I am showing
And showing love perhaps is being in love
To be in love
Psst, she says
No I think I do Mom, at some minute level at least
I kind of understand this cliche
But naturally I think I know it better than that
Because this fallen feeling is securely fragile
It's like being under a house of cards
Come, come with me I'll show you
It is worth the edged unknown
The air is weightless here
It is thin and you don't need to breath hard
I seem to be staring at my hands
Moving them within curiosity
As though I just discovered them
As though I realized how alive I truly am
Bone flesh and blood
Is it all in me? Generating itself?
For it's not wondering why it is doing so, but just does
And perhaps I shouldn't wonder why I am here
But just do
Exist with a dance of the soul and be useful
And love, LOVE
Is the highest I can offer
So Mom, I'm practicing the art
In practicing, I think I am showing
And showing love perhaps is being in love
28.1.11
9.1.11
You're like the ocean to me
I become a part of the sea
Every time I visit the beach
Every time I'm in the water
I'm laying in your motion
Stay for awhile dear ocean
Touch my hand and you'll understand
Touch my soul, please don't let go
My body floats floats floats
And my eyes are closed while you're close
Though you may not always be here
May your spirit still live in me, near
I become a part of the sea
Every time I visit the beach
Every time I'm in the water
I'm laying in your motion
Stay for awhile dear ocean
Touch my hand and you'll understand
Touch my soul, please don't let go
My body floats floats floats
And my eyes are closed while you're close
Though you may not always be here
May your spirit still live in me, near
It's interesting how the tiniest of events lead to another. I've been working on a blog website & I think it's practically prepared to start showing so I was scoping out people to get opinions. I have an older cousin who has graduated a few years back that majored in art and is pursuing it in his humble life. Only now have I become fascinated that him and I strive for an artistic life among our family and I've never initiated a connection. Anyways, then I saw things he has been posting and there was a video, so I proceeded to play and watch it as you may do the same. Come back here after.
http://www.boingboing.net/2011/01/04/donuts-genocide-and.html
It was one of those moments where life washes over you. This provoked me to call my parents in the middle of the video and ask my mom if in their free time can she and my dad make a timeline of their lives. To include not only struggles but perhaps good memories also and the feelings connected to such events. I know blurry bits and pieces, but I can never get a feel of how they are through past reasoning since I'm not as aware as I'd like to be. I'd like to gain more understanding, especially through their own reflections. So this is a message cyberly being sent through the universe that please, please let my parents take mental journeys to bring forth realization, renewed appreciation, and acknowledgment for both me and them. It's beyond belief to know my parents, aunts, uncles, and grandparents went through this when they came over from Cambodia at this same time. How fascinating that my childhood visits to my grandparents donut shops were much more than my focus to get rainbow sprinkles. A great amount more. That my family has gone through these similar hardships and how easy it is to wash away the bad thoughts, leaving them unknown for the people of different time.
http://www.boingboing.net/2011/01/04/donuts-genocide-and.html
It was one of those moments where life washes over you. This provoked me to call my parents in the middle of the video and ask my mom if in their free time can she and my dad make a timeline of their lives. To include not only struggles but perhaps good memories also and the feelings connected to such events. I know blurry bits and pieces, but I can never get a feel of how they are through past reasoning since I'm not as aware as I'd like to be. I'd like to gain more understanding, especially through their own reflections. So this is a message cyberly being sent through the universe that please, please let my parents take mental journeys to bring forth realization, renewed appreciation, and acknowledgment for both me and them. It's beyond belief to know my parents, aunts, uncles, and grandparents went through this when they came over from Cambodia at this same time. How fascinating that my childhood visits to my grandparents donut shops were much more than my focus to get rainbow sprinkles. A great amount more. That my family has gone through these similar hardships and how easy it is to wash away the bad thoughts, leaving them unknown for the people of different time.
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