One day Buddha was walking through a village. A very angry and rude young man came up and began insulting him. "You have no right teaching others," he shouted. "You are as stupid as everyone else. You are nothing but a fake."

Buddha was not upset by these insults. Instead he asked the young man "Tell me, if you buy a gift for someone, and that person does not take it, to whom does the gift belong?"

The man was surprised to be asked such a strange question and answered, "It would belong to me, because I bought the gift."

The Buddha smiled and said, "That is correct. And it is exactly the same with your anger. If you become angry with me and I do not get insulted, then the anger falls back on you. You are then the only one who becomes unhappy, not me. All you have done is hurt yourself."

"If you want to stop hurting yourself, you must get rid of your anger and become loving instead. When you hate others, you yourself become unhappy. But when you love others, everyone is happy."

The young man listened closely to these wise words of the Buddha. "You are right, o Enlightened One, "he said. "Please teach me the path of love. I wish to become your follower."

The Buddha answered kindly, "Of course. I teach anyone who truly wants to learn. Come with me."

Thought of the Day: DON'T LIVE SOMEBODY ELSE'S DREAM.

Dear Ones -

I found this picture today that my husband took of me in 2011, doing research for THE SIGNATURE OF ALL THINGS. This photo captures exactly what I did for three straight years. I sat in a chair, reading books about botany, evolution, abolition, women's history, missionaries, Dutch 18th century commerce, and more...in order to fill my brains (and index cards) with enough information to write that novel.

There is no situation in which I could possibly be happier than this — submerged in the vocation that I love, vanishing for hours a day into my work.

Un-showered, greasy hair, eyes tired, totally falling down the rabbit hole of research...this is me, living my dream.

I was thinking today about all the other paths that I did not take in life, no matter how shiny and appealing they may have looked. I've had the possibility of living so many different kinds of life that could have been a dream for somebody else. I never choose those lives. I've never lived the dreams that other people wanted for themselves — nor have I lived the dreams that other people may have wanted for me.

I never had children...because that's somebody else's dream.

I never took the opportunities that were offered to me after the success of EAT PRAY LOVE to have a TV show of my own...because that's somebody else's dream.

I never took a good steady job teaching writing at a nice college...because that's somebody else's dream.

I didn't remain in Bali or Rome, gorgeous as those places are...because that's somebody else's dream.

I turn down 99% of the invitations I get to attend to fancy parties and stellar gatherings...because that's somebody else's dream.

I sold my big beautiful house with its fabulous gardens and lovely library...because one day I looked around at that gorgeous home and realized: "This is somebody else's dream." (Happily, I sold the house to the family whose dream it actually was. So we all win.)

I never hired a team of personal assistants and staff and consultants to help me "grow my brand"...because that's somebody else's dream.

I know what makes me come to life — working on my books — and this picture tells the whole story. Knowing what makes me come to life has helped me to distinguish between my dreams and the dreams of others.

WHAT MAKES YOU COME TO LIFE?

Ask yourself this question, whenever you are given any choice or opportunity. Ask: "Will saying YES to this path bring me closer to the source that brings me to life? Or will it take me further away?"

No matter how alluring, no matter how beautiful, no matter how sparkling and fancy and delicious — do not say YES to other people's dreams.

Do your own thing. Live in your own waking dream. Stubbornly.

Even if it means not washing your hair for a week. (ESPECIALLY if it means that!)

ONWARD,
LG

Dear Ones -

Some of you may remember these lines from EAT PRAY LOVE.

These are the words I said to myself (wrote to myself, actually) when I was lonely and scared in the middle of the night in Rome, far away from all who loved me.

This was a practice I had started about a year earlier, when I was in the worst of my depression — to write compassionate and loving letters to myself in a notebook, saying to myself everything I had always wished somebody else would say to me.

Until I learned how to speak to myself this way, I had no chance of peace.

Other people can love you. Other people can comfort you. But other people often come and go. And if you can't soothe and reassure yourself in your darkest, loneliest hour, nobody can.

There were nights when I sat up for hours, writing words like this to myself again and again, through a scrim of tears and waves of panic. And often another (angrier) part of me would scrawl at the bottom of the page: "This is bullshit. I don't believe in you." Then I would patiently begin writing again at the top of the next page, "But I believe in YOU. And I will not leave your side. I will love you and take care of you forever..." On it would go, until I could finally fall asleep.

Then again the next night...and so on.

That's how I walked through my darkest valley.

I will tell you this — there are STILL hard nights sometimes when I take out the old notebook and ask, "Are you still there?"

"I am still here," I will start writing, "I'm not going anywhere. I'm right here with you. I love you and I will take care of you..."

My promise to myself is this: I will walk beside myself for as long as I live, holding my own hand, taking care of the soul with which I have been entrusted.

I will do that always, whether anybody else is in the room with me or not.

You must learn how to tell yourself that you are loved. You must tell yourself this again and again until slowly you learn to believe it. Start writing yourself love letters. It feels weird at first, but keep going. Practice. Practice more. Practice EVEN more. You'll need it someday — or you may need it right now.

Life can be hard, but without your own certain love for your own tenderest self, it is simply impossible.

Be good to you.

ONWARD,
LG

The Creator gathered all of Creation and said:
“I want to hide something from the humans until they are ready for it. It is the realisation that they create their own reality.”
The eagle said, “Give it to me. I will take it to the moon.”
The Creator said, “No. One day they will go there and find it.”
The salmon said, “I will bury it on the bottom of the ocean.”
The Creator said, “No. They will go there, too.”
The buffalo said, “I will bury it on the Great Plains.”
The Creator said, “They will cut into the skin of the earth and find it even there.”
Grandmother Mole, who lives in the breast of Mother Earth, and who has no physical eyes but sees with spiritual eyes, said “Put it inside of them.”
And the Creator said, “It is done.”
- Creation Story from the Hopi Nation, Arizona, North America

I'd like to be many persons in my one person. I'd like to feel infinite but aware that I am finite, though in the end I may indeed be infinite. Because once I'm met by you aren't you a little bit of me and I a little bit of you? We're all particles in motion exchanging bits and energy perhaps.

--Oct 22 2014

GOODNESS: http://markmanson.net/life-purpose

THE MOST STRANGELY REASSURING ADVICE I EVER RECEIVED.

Long ago, when I was in my desperate and confused 20's, a brilliant, independent, wonderful woman in her 70's gave me this incredible piece of life wisdom.

She said:

"We women spend our 20's and 30's so worried about what everyone is thinking about us. Then we get into our 40's and 50's, and we finally start to be free, because we decide we don't give a damn what anyone thinks of us. But you will not be completely free until your 60's and 70's, when you will finally realize this liberating truth — NOBODY WAS EVER THINKING ABOUT YOU, ANYHOW."

They aren't. They weren't. They never were.

People are just thinking about themselves — all caught up in their own dramas, their own fears, their own regrets and tasks and insecurities and distractions.

"You aren't on anybody's mind," my friend told me. "They don't have room in their minds to be worried about what you're wearing, what you're doing, how you're living..."

While it may seem lonely and horrible at first to imagine that you aren't on anybody's mind, there is also — as my wise older friend told me — a great liberation to be found in this idea.

I wrote down her message in my lucky notebook, and I've kept it nearby forever (along with my plucky, self-confident little fox totem.)

You are free, because everyone is too busy worrying about themselves to worry about you.

Go be who you want to be, then.

Do what you want to do.

Dress how you want to dress.

Love who you want to love.

It's exceeding likely that nobody will even notice.

And that's AWESOME.

ONWARD,
Liz Gilbert